Happy Valentine's Day Amazons!

Yes I said it.  Happy V-A-L-E-N-T-I-N-E-S Day.  The commercialization of love is upon us!  Don't let it get you down Amazons.  On all the other days in the year, it doesn't matter if you have someone else in your life, so why should it be different on this day? 

Do Amazons let men into their lives so that they'll have a Valentine? Someone to cook them dinner on February 14.  Someone to buy them flowers and give them kisses.  Is that why you're in a relationship now?  For one day out of the year?  I'm not.

I'm not in it for the day when red and pink hearts pop up all around town, smothering passers-by with sickeningly sweet sentiments.  Don't get me wrong; I don't want to be construed as being bitter. I simply don't believe that any of this is healthy; not for people in relationships and definitely not for people who happen to be single on February 14.

If you need a reason to shower your significant other with love, adorations, etc. then perhaps you're with the wrong person.  Because I speak from experience when I say that I've spent a couple of Valentine's Days with a couple of different boyfriends and being together on that day didn't mean much in the grand scheme of things.

Case in point:  One Valentine's Day my boyfriend-at-the-time came over to my apartment and cooked me a lovely dinner.  He brought me red roses and we had chocolate fondue for dessert.  Wonderful evening.  Two months later, he told me that he didn't feel the relationship was going to go the distance (paraphrasing of course). 

Umm...what?  Excuse me.  That's not how this works.  You see, you were romantic on Valentine's Day, therefore we are bound by the laws of chalk-like candy hearts and all things Dove Chocolate to be together forever.  I. WISH.

When I was younger, and more naive, and less like an Amazon, I used this day as a barometer of the success of my life.  Because we're nothing if no one wants to date us, right?  WRONG.  I finally realized that this year.  And it makes me proud that I see my in-relationship friends and don't think "Goddamn I hate you and your lovey-dovey significant other and aren't you two just the cutest fucking things in the world and I want to barf now."  This year, rather, I think "Good for you!" and continue on with my life.  And when I see my single friends I think "Power to you!"

The next time I'm in a relationship when Valentine's Day rolls around, I hope it will be nice.  Maybe he'll cook me dinner (because cooks are hot) and maybe he'll bring me flowers (because I do like flowers).  But I'd want him to cook me dinner on other days too.  And I'll gladly accept flowers on February 15 and March 3 and November 12.  Because I like flowers on any day of the year. '

That is what I want to convey to Amazons everywhere.  Now if you'll excuse me, I've got to go eat some more chocolate.